Gabriel went to the Lord and said, "I have to talk to you. We have some
> Texans up here who are causing some real problems... They're swinging on the
> Pearly Gates, my horn is missing, and they are wearing T-shirts instead of
> their robes; there's barbecue sauce and picante sauce all over everything,
> especially their T-shirts;
> their dogs are riding in the chariots and chasing the sheep.
>
> They are wearing baseball caps and cowboy hats instead of their halos.
>
> They refuse to keep the stairway to Heaven clean, and their boots are
> marking and scuffing up the halls of Wisdom. There are watermelon seeds and
> tortilla chip crumbs all over the place. Some of them are walking around
> with just one wing; and they insist on bringing their darn horses with
> them."
>
> The Lord said, "Texans are Texans, Gabriel. Heaven is home to all of my
> children. If you want to know about real problems, call the Devil."
>
> So Gabriel calls the Devil who answers the phone and says, "Hello -- hold on
> a minute..."
>
> When he returns to the phone the Devil says, "O.K., I'm back. What can I do
> for you?"
>
> Gabriel replied, "I just want to know what kinds of problems you are having
> down there with the Texans."
>
> The Devil said, "Hold on again. I need to check on something."
>
> After about 5 minutes the Devil returned to the phone and said. "I'm back.
> Now what was the question?"
>
> Gabriel said, "What kind of problems are you having down there with the
> Texans?"
>
> The Devil said, "Man, I don't believe this...hold on!!!!"
>
> This time the Devil was gone 15 minutes and when he returns he says, "I'm
> sorry Gabriel -- I can't talk right now!! Red Adair has put out the fire
> here and now Brown & Root is installing air conditioning!!!!"
>
> Always remember ... TEXANS SURVIVE ... despite the odds against us!!!