What kind of bagel can fly?
A plain bagel
How do you hold a bagel back?
You put lox on it
Why did the bagel lose the election?
He was the victim of a schmear campaign
What does a bagel do when it is locked out of its house?
Call a loxsmith
What do ghosts put on their bagels?
Scream Cheese
I found a store that only sells bagels and donuts
It's called 'Hole Foods'
Two eggs, a bagel, and a sausage walk into a bar.
?Bartender, my friends and I would like a cold one,? says one of the eggs.
?Sorry. We don?t serve breakfast.?
Customer: I would like to buy a bagel with cream cheese
Waiter: I'm sorry we only accept cash.
Do you prefer your bagels toasted?
(Raises drink)........TO BAGELS!!!!!!
Two bagels are out flying. All of the sudden one of them plummets to the ground. Why?
Because bagels can't fly!
Why did the guy enter an RV contest at a bagel shop?
He wanted to Winnebago.