Beemaster's International Beekeeping Forum
MEMBER & GUEST INTERACTION SECTION => HUMOR IS A FUNNY THING => Topic started by: iddee on March 13, 2011, 07:13:08 pm
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It started out innocently enough. I began to think at parties now and then - just to loosen up and be a part of the crowd.
Inevitably, though, one thought led to another and soon I was more than just a social thinker.
I began to think alone -- "to relax," I told myself -- but I knew it wasn't true. Thinking became more and more important to me, and finally I was thinking all the time.
That was when things began to sour at home. One evening I turned off the TV and asked my wife about the meaning of life. She spent that night at her mother's.
I began to think on the job. I knew that thinking and employment don't mix, but I couldn't help myself.
I began to avoid friends at lunchtime so I could read Thoreau, Muir, Confucius, Camus and Kafka. I would return to the office dizzied and confused, asking, "What is it exactly that we are doing here?"
One day the boss called me in. He said, "Listen, I like you, and it hurts me to say this, but your thinking has become a real problem. If you don't stop thinking on the job, you'll have to find another job."
This gave me a lot to think about. I came home early after my conversation with the boss. "Honey," I confessed, "I've been thinking..."
"I know you've been thinking," she said, "and I want a divorce!" "But Honey, surely it's not that serious." "It is serious," she said, her lower lip aquiver.
"You think as much as college professors and college professors don't make any money, so if you keep on thinking, we won't have any money!"
"That's a fallacious syllogism," I said impatiently.
She exploded in tears of rage and frustration, but I was in no mood to deal with the emotional drama.
"I'm going to the library," I snarled as I stomped out the door.
I headed for the library, in the mood for some John Locke. I roared into the parking lot with NPR on the radio and ran up to the big glass doors.
They didn't open. The library was closed.
To this day, I believe that a Higher Power was looking out for me that night.
Leaning on the unfeeling glass and whimpering for Emerson, a poster caught my eye, "Friend, is heavy thinking ruining your life?" it asked.
You probably recognize that line. It comes from the standard Thinkers Anonymous poster.
This is why I am what I am today: a recovering thinker.
I never miss a TA meeting. At each meeting we watch a non-educational video; last week it was "Porky's." Then we share experiences about how we avoided thinking since the last meeting.
I still have my job, and things are a lot better at home. Life just seemed easier, somehow, as soon as I stopped thinking. I think the road to recovery is nearly complete for me.
Today I took the final step... I joined the Democratic Party.
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:lau:
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:-D
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I can quit whenever I want.
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X:X
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Today I took the final step... I joined the Democratic Party.
My family have always been devout, die hard Democrats-I'm registered as one myself. I can remember family political talks where to be a Democrat, one was a conservative, God fearing, blue collar worker that believed that his money and property were his and that the Government need not meddle in our affairs. Now, if you look at things, in particular in this administration, there has been a complete reversal in party beliefs and stances. My grandfather has probably already rolled over in his grave several times in the past 2 years alone.
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not sure it's accurate to say the parties are reversed. they are divided. that's why political party titles are misleading. there is a distinct difference between the so called "blue dogs" and the progressives. the power in the democrat party has more often resided with the progressives. republicans are also divided. people like Nelson Rockefeller were certainly not conservatives. John McCain is not a conservative.
it's policy ideas that matter, not party affiliation. you don't often find me calling myself a republican. i am a conservative. i will vote for the most conservative candidate which ever party they run under. more often they are republicans, but in local elections they have sometimes been democrats.
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I have also heard of the party reversal. That Rebs were liberal and Dems were conservative at one time...... A long time ago. Not something that has just happened with this President.
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Gave it up a long time ago, it hurt too much !!!
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I have also heard of the party reversal. That Rebs were liberal and Dems were conservative at one time...... A long time ago. Not something that has just happened with this President.
Sorry Iddee, didnt mean to hijack your post. But I agree, I know it didnt just happen with Obama, it's been more of a gradual thing. And as far as voting is concerned Kathy..I would probably do the same but when you go in the polls you have to declare which party. How do you pick and choose from all the available candidates? Would declaring Independent allow me to do so? Ive always declared "D" and picked from the list. And yes I voted for THE idiot, so feel free to plant a boot in my posterior. Hind sight is always 20/20.
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This is the joke forum. I didn't know you could hijack a thread here. It's open house as far as I know.
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This is the joke forum.
And most politicians fall under this category anyways.
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Well said.......
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That Rebs were liberal and Dems were conservative at one time...... A long time ago. Not something that has just happened with this President
this is not true. around the 60's when the left discovered that the minority vote was important, they began to float this idea that the democrats were now what the old republicans had been. however, if you go back and look at party platform throughout history, you'll find this is not true.
it was not until after the dems lost the fights to block civil rights...and that was all the way up through LBJ, that they decided that they could co-opt the civil rights movement and turn it into a welfare movement. that's the saddest thing of all, i think.
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I have also heard of the party reversal. That Rebs were liberal and Dems were conservative at one time...... A long time ago. Not something that has just happened with this President.
Sorry Iddee, didnt mean to hijack your post. But I agree, I know it didnt just happen with Obama, it's been more of a gradual thing. And as far as voting is concerned Kathy..I would probably do the same but when you go in the polls you have to declare which party. How do you pick and choose from all the available candidates? Would declaring Independent allow me to do so? Ive always declared "D" and picked from the list. And yes I voted for THE idiot, so feel free to plant a boot in my posterior. Hind sight is always 20/20.
:fishhit: :fishhit: :deadhorse: :rant: :whip:
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How do you pick and choose from all the available candidates? Would declaring Independent allow me to do so? Ive always declared "D" and picked from the list. And yes I voted for THE idiot, so feel free to plant a boot in my posterior. Hind sight is always 20/20.
in some states the primary vote is restricted to party. however, when you get the general election, you can vote for whomever you want. in some states you can go "undeclared" in primary elections and you'll get a full ballot. in some states independents can vote either way. my state is open, so i can vote either party.
you can be forgiven for one mistake. just don't make the same one again!! :evil: