Bob was staring sadly into his beer and sighed heavily.
"What`s up Bob?" asked the bartender "It`s not like you to be so down in the mouth."
"It`s my five year old son", the man replied.
"Don`t tell me, he`s in trouble for fighting in school? - my lad`s just the same. Forget about it; it happens to boys that age," said the bartender, sympathetically.
"I only wish it was that," continued the customer, "but it`s far worse than that. The little devil has got our gorgeous 18 year old next door neighbour pregnant."
"Get away, that`s impossible!" gasped the bartender.
"It`s not," said the man. "The little bastard stuck a pin in all my condoms."