I've done my best to transcribe these. Biden is usually slurring his words and it's hard to capture that, it also makes it difficult to transcribe at all, but I have spelled things the way they seem to sound. These odd spellings are not typographical, they are attempts to capture what was said.
"Imagine what we can do next. Four more years, pause."--Joe Biden
"In a sense I don't know why we're surprised by Trump. How many times does he have to prove we can't be trusted?"--Joe Biden
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/gnPbrf9wqeY"Barak and I think it's a RIGHT to have badacafcar."--Joe Biden
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/ZyoC2kvUr3Y?feature=share"If you try anything to raise the cost resillionjobs I will veto it."--Joe Biden
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LIFaFLiI50A"Beer brew here ish is used to make the brew beer, har ish were defining. Oooooo Earth Rider."--Joe Biden (Earth Rider is the name of the brewery where he was speaking)
https://www.foxnews.com/video/6345587907112"We'll tea Donald Trump a valable lesson, don mess with ma mwomelininmofmerica unless you want to ge the bemefit."--Joe Biden
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7h5mVoq8KWM"Because we cannot get reelect...We cannot win this re-election. We, we can only reelect Donald Trump"--Joe Biden
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8BI0khVcFRE"Secondly, we are in a situation where we have put together, and d you d a guys d did it for our administration, t' president Obama's administration, before this, we have put together, I think the most (pause) extensive and inclusive voter fraud (pause) orgainzation in the history of American politics."--Joe Biden
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MA8a2g6tTp0"I'm prepared to say that I have a record of over 40 years and that I'm going to be Joe Biden."--Joe Biden
"The major things we've done, but what we haven't done, is we haven't been able to communicate it in a way that is uh um muh muh say it another way..."--Joe Biden
"The first frost, you knew what's happenin'. you had to put on the window wipers to get literally the oil slick off the window, that's why I and so darn many of the people I grew up with have cancer."--Joe Biden
"The way Trump, the way that China will respond is when we gather the rest of the world that in fact invasion and free an in in open trade an making sure we're in a position, that the worl' we deal with double you aich oh the right way, that in fact that's when things begin to change that's when China that's when China's behavior is gonna change."--Joe Biden
"We bring social workers into homes and parents to help them deal with how to raise their children. It's not that thely don't wanna help, they don't know quite what to do. Play the radio, make sure the television, excuse me, make sure you have the record player on at night the the phone, make sure the kids hear words. A kid coming from a poor school, a poor background will hear four million fewer words by the time they get there."--Joe Biden
"That's why we d defeated in 2018 when we they tried--we went 54 states"--Joe Biden
"If you agree with me go to Joe three oh, three, three oh and help me with this fight."--Joe Biden
"Text Joe two three, scuse me I gotta get this right, text Joe three oh three three oh."--Joe Biden
"I'm running as a proud Democrat for the senate"--Joe Biden in his presidential campaign.
"and representives, uh Shel Shelly Jackson Lee, Al Green, Silvia Garcia, Lizzy Penely, Penel, uh what am I doing, I'm gonna lose track here and uh uh..."--Joe Biden
"thanks to Ron White n, Jeff Merkly and Earl Baum, Earl scuse me, I know, you can call me Bid un, Joe Bid un."--Joe Biden
"It is noteworthy uh that the percentage of women, who registered to vote and cast a ballot is consistently higher than the percentage of the men who do so end of quote. Repeat the line. women who are not without electoral and or, or political let me be precise, not and or, or political power."--Joe Biden
"I wanna thank thuh, the, the uh, sec-, the former General, I keep calling him General but my my uh the guy who runs that outfit over there, uh I wanna make sure we thank the secretary."--Joe Biden
"No one's ever wondered do I mean what I say, the question is I sometimes say all that I mean."--Joe Biden
"I guess that old expression 'the proof in the pudding is in the eating'"--Joe Biden
"I'm going to hand it over to uh secretary--p--p--Mr. secretary I'm going to have you speak now."--Joe Biden
"Let me start off with two words: 'made in America'"--Joe Biden
"America is a Nation that can be summed up in one word--asnfthfth exu me, foothills of the Himalayas, ya know when xi zing ping, traveling with him (unintelligible) traveled 17,000 miles I uz Vice President, I don't know that for a fact."--Joe Biden
"You know our natural wonders uh are uh you know inspired (slur uninteligible) reflection inspires uh our rut to take action you know uh uh."--Joe Biden
"Bridge over the uh uh over the huh over the Holly river look a and Warshaw or uh uh should be uh uh oh Washa county in uh Nevada we're spending 89 billion dollars to add several lanes..."Joe Biden
"My younger sister used to be three years younger than me, now she's 23 years younger. There's not a single solitary Biden man that is as ol younger than any Biden woman. And uh, and uh my wife by the way her--at her community college, my wife is teaching today, my wife is a full-time college professor at a community college."--Joe Biden
"More than half the women in my cabinet, more than half the people in my cabinet, more than half the women in my administration are women."--Joe Biden
"They'll construct a second fab here in Phoenix to build chips 3 nanochips uh 3 nanochip, chips that are 3 nano-[unintelligible]-you know what I'm sayin' nano no no I don't know."--Joe Biden
"As I said my dad [unintelligible] say pay checks a lot more than you know, it's about your dignity."--Joe Biden
"I'll lead an effective strategy to mobilize [unintelligible]!"--Joe Biden
"You ever been to a caucus?...No you haven't. You're a lying dog-faced pony soldier."--Joe Biden
"We hol dese trues to be self-levident all men and women created, by go, you know the, you know the thing!"--Joe Biden
"You know there's a uh, during World War II, uh, you know, where Roosevelt came up with a thing uh, that uh, you know, was totally different than a, than the, the it's called, he called it the, you know the World War II, he had the war -- the War Production Board"--Joe Biden
"But the case-- we cannot get this -- we've never allowed any crisis from a Civil War straight through to a pandemic in '17 all the way arou--, '16 we have never, never let our democracy sake second fiddle, we can both have a democracy and elections and at the same time protect the public health."--Joe Biden
"I may be Irish but I'm not stupid"--Joe Biden
"We have this notion that somehow if you're poor you can not do it. Poor kids are just as bright and just as talented as white kids."--Joe Biden
"When the stock market crashed, Franklin Roosevelt got on the television and didn't just talk about the princes of greed. He said, 'look here's what happened'"--Joe Biden. Of course FDR was not president during the crash, Hoover was, and TV wasn't in common usage and FDR was never on TV.
"His mom lived in Long Island for 10 years or so, god rest her soul, and, er, although she's, wait--your mom's still alive. It was your dad passed. God bless her soul. I gotta get this straight"--Joe Biden
"A man I'm proud to call my friend. A man who will be the next President of the United States--Barack America!"--Joe Biden August 2008
"In Delaware, the largest growth of population is Indian Americans, moving from India. You cannot go to a 7/11 or a Dunkin' Donuts unless you have a sight Indian accent. I'm not joking."--Joe Biden
"I mean you got the first mainstream African-American who is articulate and bright and clean and a nice-looking guy. I mean, that's a storybook man."--Joe Biden
"Now is the time to heed the timeless advice from Teddy Roosevelt: 'Speak softly and carry a big stock.' I promise you, the president has a big stick."--Joe Biden, speaking of President Obama.
"There have not been many of the senators from Delaware. It's a small state,"--Joe Biden (every state gets 2 senators...)
"I'm also sending to Congress a comprehensive package of -- that will enhance our underlying effort to accommodate the Russian oligarchs and make sure we take their -- take their, their ill-begotten gains... Ha, we're going to 'accommodate' them, (snort) we're going to seize their yachts, their luxury homes, and other ill-begotten gains of Putin's kleptocra--yeah... Kleptocracy and klep--the guys who are the kleptocracies, but these are bad guys."--Joe Biden
"If your home is powered by safer, cheaper, cleaner electricity, like solar or heat pumps, you can save about $500 a month on average,"--Joe Biden (obviously not true)
"Do you think inflation is a political liability? No it's a great asset--more inflation, (muttering) what a stupid son of a bleep." --Joe Biden
"The likelihood there's going to be the Taliban overrunning everything and owning the whole country is highly unlikely,"--Joe Biden just before the Afghanistan withdrawal.
"When President Harris and I took a virtual tour of a vaccination center in Arizona not long ago, one of the nurses on that, on that tour injecting people, giving vaccinations, said that each shot was like administering a dose of hope."--Joe Biden. I shouldn't have to point it out, but Harris is not President.
"Clap for that, you stupid bastards,"--Joe Biden Giving a speech to the 380th Air Expeditionary Wing stationed in Abu Dhabi.
"No their byut 16 and foryet a lot more of ythat another 20 or so. Ima gyana be yona."--Joe Biden
"a billion, two hundred trillion a billion dollars"--Joe Biden
"it's gonna bring a billion trillion seven hundred million billion dollars off the sidelines in investment."--Joe Biden responding to questions about inflation.
"All products coming into the United States of America on the West coast come through j uh Los Angeles and uh and uh uh uh um I'm on my--what am I doin' here uh (Cooper says Long Beach) Long Beach, thank you."--Joe Biden CNN town hall with Anderson Cooper.
"Do you know how many tax loopholes there are? in the code now? 1 trillion 640 billion. Eliminate one."--Joe Biden
"I commuted [on Amtrak] every single day for 36 years as vice president of the United States after my wife and daughter were killed, I went home to see my family, never stopped," Biden
"And the question is whether or not we should be in a position where you are -- why can't the -- the -- the experts say, 'We know that this virus is, in fact -- it's going to be' -- or, excuse me -- 'We know why all the drugs approved are not temporarily approved, but permanently approved.' That's underway too. I expect that to occur quickly,"--Joe Biden CNN town hall with Anderson Cooper
"The members of Congress know, from their colleagues in Congress that, uh, you know, the, looks like a tornado, they don't call them that anymore, that hit the crops and wetlands in the middle of the country, in Iowa and Nevada. It's just across the board."--Joe Biden (so what do they call tornado now?)
"so there's there there I I don't I have I must tell you I don't have a near term answer but there's two things I can do. I can go in the petroleum reserves and take out and probably reduce release reduce the price of gas maybe 18 cents or so a gallon. That's still going to be above 3 bucks. And one of the things that I refuse to have hap because I didn't want anybody to-made a commitment if you pass the stuff I'm talking about not not one single penny in tax will go against anybody making less than 400 grand and so if you notice this is these highway bills are not paid for by gas tax"--Joe Biden
"It would put 720 million women back in the workforce"--Joe Biden
There are only 330 million people in the US. Of those about 200 million are adults of working age. Of those about 100 million are women of working age... and of those 71.75 million are already working. So if every woman, even the ones who don't want to work, went to work, that would only be about 29 million, a bit less than 720 million by a factor of 25 x... You'll notice he doesn't just misplace a decimal point here and there... he makes up the numbers on the fly. Also, according to Biden we lost 120 million to COVID and 150 Million to "Gun Deaths" which only leaves about 60 million people in the entire US of which roughly 20 million must be children and 20 million men of working age and 20 million women of working age. Since 71.75 million women are working already...
"Now we have over 120 million dead from COVID."--Joe Biden
"In addition to that, I passed the Brady bill with waiting periods. I led that fight. But my friend on my right," Biden said, gesturing to Sen. Bernie Sanders, "and others have in fact also gave in to the gun manufacturers' absolute immunity. Imagine if I stood here and said we give immunity to drug companies. We give immunity to tobacco companies. That has caused carnage on our streets; 150 million people have been killed since 2007, when Bernie voted to exempt gun manufacturers from liability. More than all the wars, including Vietnam, from that point on."--Joe Biden (according to FBI statistics the total "gun deaths" for those 12 years is 180,642. 150 million is off by a factor of 830 times. The number of U.S. deaths in all wars combined according to Wikipedia is 2.8 Million so saying it's more than the number of deaths in all wars combined is off by a factor of 16)
FBI total gun deaths (all guns) by year (including accidents, suicides, justifiable self defense, justifiable police shootings, murder etc.)
2007-14,916
2008-14,224
2009-13,752
2010-13,164
2011-12,664
2012-12,765
2013-12,253
2014-14,123
2015-13,847
2016-15,355
2017-15,206
2018-14,446
2019-13,927
Total: 180,642
120 million to Covid and 150 million to guns would be 270 million people dead, leaving only 60 million Americans alive.
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